Se and si: reflexive, reciprocal and “for oneself”

Half the verbs of this unit end in se, and that is not decoration: without the particle the verb means something else or nothing at all. The difference between se and si is a case difference, worth sorting out once and for all. For example: “Po prepiru sta se pobotala v en dan” — After the quarrel the two of them made up within a day. A rule from the Slovenian course: worked out on examples, not memorized as a…

Updated September 1, 2026 · Lingofly

How it works

Half the verbs of this unit end in se, and that is not decoration: without the particle the verb means something else or nothing at all. The difference between se and si is a case difference, worth sorting out once and for all.

Se — accusative: the action comes back onto the doer as a whole. sramovati se, zaljubiti se, pobotati se, obnašati se. In some verbs the particle is inseparable — bati se, smejati se — and without it the word simply does not exist, like 'rely' without 'on'.

Si — dative: the action is done for oneself, and the thing stands apart: privoščiti si dopust, kupiti si kavo, umiti si roke, deliti si sobo. The test is simple: if English wants 'for myself' with a thing, it will be si.

A third use is unfamiliar to an English speaker: se and si express reciprocity, and then the verb is almost always dual. pobotala sta se — the two of them made up, razšla sta se — they split up, pišeta si — they write to each other. English builds this with 'each other'; Slovenian gets by with the particle and the dual.

The particle's place in the sentence is not free: it is a clitic and takes second place, and combined with the helper sem/si/je the order is rigid — sem se, si se, but in the third person se je. Hence zaljubil sem se and zaljubil se je. Swapping the order is the most audible mistake in live speech, because the phrase at once stops sounding Slovenian.

Table

Se and si: reflexive, reciprocal and “for oneself”
formcasemeaningexample
seaccusativethe action onto oneselfumil se je
sidativethe action for oneselfumil si je roke
seaccusativereciprocalpobotala sta se
sidativereciprocal with a thingdelita si sobo
seinseparableno verb without itbati se
sem se1st personthe order in the pastzaljubil sem se
se je3rd personthe order in the pastzaljubil se je

By example

  • Po prepiru sta se pobotala v en dan
    After the quarrel the two of them made up within a day
  • Enkrat na leto si privoščim dober obed
    Once a year I treat myself to a good meal
  • Ne sramuj se vprašati, če česa ne razumeš
    Don’t be ashamed to ask if you don’t understand something

How the rule settles in your head

A rule is not memorized from an explanation. It is memorized from an attempt to use it and a mistake — that is why the app delivers it mixed in with words, not as a separate lesson: it resurfaces exactly where you forgot it.

Frequently asked

Se vs si in Slovenian?

Half the verbs of this unit end in se, and that is not decoration: without the particle the verb means something else or nothing at all. The difference between se and si is a case difference, worth sorting out once and for all.

Umil se je or umil si je roke?

Se — accusative: the action comes back onto the doer as a whole. sramovati se, zaljubiti se, pobotati se, obnašati se. In some verbs the particle is inseparable — bati se, smejati se — and without it the word simply does not exist, like 'rely' without 'on'.

What the particle se is for in Slovenian verbs?

Si — dative: the action is done for oneself, and the thing stands apart: privoščiti si dopust, kupiti si kavo, umiti si roke, deliti si sobo. The test is simple: if English wants 'for myself' with a thing, it will be si.

Zaljubil sem se or zaljubil se sem?

A third use is unfamiliar to an English speaker: se and si express reciprocity, and then the verb is almost always dual. pobotala sta se — the two of them made up, razšla sta se — they split up, pišeta si — they write to each other. English builds this with 'each other'; Slovenian gets by with the…

How to say each other in Slovenian?

The particle's place in the sentence is not free: it is a clitic and takes second place, and combined with the helper sem/si/je the order is rigid — sem se, si se, but in the third person se je. Hence zaljubil sem se and zaljubil se je. Swapping the order is the most audible mistake in live speech…

What does it look like in an example sentence Slovenian?

“Po prepiru sta se pobotala v en dan” — After the quarrel the two of them made up within a day. A rule is easier to test on sentences like this than to memorize as a wording: what surfaces in conversation is the sentence.

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